Архив конференции Fidonet HUMOR.FILTERED,
нагло упертый мной с http://hf.kru.to/
(координатор - Евгений Плисс), и переведенный в html :-)
- HUMOR.FILTERED ---------------------------------------------- HUMOR.FILTERED - From : Dmitry Zavalishin 2:5020/32 14 Mar 97 00:40:56 Subj : 4hf -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ====================================================== * Forward from area L.dz.sdm * Original from Vadim Serkov 2:463/11 to Dmitry Zavalishin 2:5020/32 * Original about "4hf" ====================================================== >From some tests and class papers in school: * Many dead animals of the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil. * All animals were here before mankind. The animals lived peacefully until mankind came along and made roads, houses, hotels and condoms. * Men are mammals and women are femammals. * Proteins are composed of a mean old acid. * The largest mammals are to be found in the sea because there is nowhere else to put them. * Involuntary muscles are not as willing as voluntary ones. * Methane, a greenhouse gas, comes from the burning of trees and cows. * The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom. * Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. * Some people say we condescended from the apes. * The leopard has black spots which look like round soars on its body. Those who catch soars get leprosy. * The three cavities of the body are the head cavity, the tooth cavity and the abominable cavity. * Most books say the sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into the sun in the daytime. * Cadavers are dead bodies that have donated themselves to science. This procedure is called gross anatomy. * A liter is a nest of young baby animals. * The earth makes a resolution every 24 hours. * Parallel lines never meet unless you bend one or both of them. * Algebra was the wife of Euclid. * A circle is a figure with 0 corners and only one side. * A right angle is 90 degrees Farenhight. * Genetics explains why you look like your father and if you don't, why you should. * A supersaturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold. * The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects. * An example of animal breeding is the farmer who mated a bull that gave a great deal of milk with a bull with good meat. * If conditions are not favorable, bacteria go into a period of adolescence. * Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. * When oxygen is combined with anything, heat is given off. This is known as constipation. * As the rain forests in the Amazon are shrinking, so are the Indians. * You can listen to thunder after lightning and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it, you got hit so never mind. Rgds, /svv 13 Mar 97, 12:24 ■ No, I don't know what "apathy" means, nor do I care. -!- GoldED 2.42.G0214+ ==================== End of Forward ==================== dz --- * Origin: Всем пацакам - установить чикаги и радоваться. (2:5020/32)
